Review 6: Slow and steady didn’t win the race this time…

Slowpoke Espresso – 157 Brunswick Street, Fitzroy 3065

‘Twas a fine summers day and we decided to get our hipster on and head to Brunswick Street, Fitzroy.  We convinced ourselves that we were going there to “shop” but we both secretly knew it was a good excuse to go out for brunch.  As neither of us was particularly familiar with the area we decided to call upon our mate, Urbanspoon to help us out.

For those of you still playing snake on your Nokias, Urbanspoon is an application that can be downloaded on to your phones or found on the Internet.  It aims to provide all the information you would want to know about the local cafes and restaurants in your area.

It’s hard to fault such a nifty app with its handy GPS features, detailed reviews, easy-to-read ratings and flashy pictures.  However, unlike most, we have decided to go where no man has ever dared go before, and pose the question “just how reliable is Urbanspoon?”

When selecting the Fitzroy suburb, Urbanspoon provided numerous brunch options, however, naturally we looked straight to the most highly rated.  After browsing through a couple of menus looking for a mash and veto-ing any cafes not within walking distance, we found our match – Slowpoke Espresso.
Slowpoke on Urbanspoon

Slowpoke Espresso is a petite little hangout with a neat little courtyard out the back.  After perusing the menu yet again, we ordered our mash and eagerly waited for its arrival.  Slowpoke describes their mash as “Avocado and feta mash w. fresh herbs and chilli on toast” for $12.

As we sat their instagramming each other in our alternative new surroundings, the mash arrived at our table before we could type in our first hashtag… #impressive

picAs we admired the presentation we couldn’t help but notice that this mash was smothered in chilli.  Although we can handle the heat of a sizeable chilli, Slowpoke had done their darndest to make it impossible to avoid so much spice. Putting this aside, we began to mark off our criteria checklist.

Presentation: a decent dish, 1/1
Avo Quality: soft, ripe and plenty of green to be seen, 2/2
Consistency: chopped up and chunky but could’ve been slightly more mashed, 1.5/2
a reasonable serving, but let’s just say brunch wouldn’t be turning into lunch… 0.5/1
Ingredients: feta, mint, chilli flakes, lemon wedge – unfortunately the feta was rather bland, a little hard for our taste, and could have been mixed through to give a more creamy texture.  The mint was appreciated, however, the chilli flakes dominated the dish, making it difficult to taste the actual mash.  All in all, a disappointing 0.5/2

WARNING: The sugar ramekins are easily mistaken for salt. Unless you’re looking for a sweet mash, don’t make the same mistake as we did and make sure you test the salt and sugar on your table beforehand!

Time to get down and dirty – did this mash have the one and only AVO factor?
No deal!
Sadly, this avo mash scored a 0/2 in this department as nothing really stood out to make it an exceptional mash.

Blogocado Mash’s rating: 5.5/10, an avocaDON’T

Who woulda thunk it, this time around Urbanspoon did not deliver the goods.  Although disappointing, it wouldn’t be fair to judge Urbanspoon purely on one visit, however, we are keen to know your thoughts so please vote in our poll and let us know if you think it is a reliable source for restaurant goodness.

Until next time, bye for now,
B & G


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